How I survived my selfie-a-day project

December 27, 2013April 30, 2015 ~ Jeni ~ Leave a comment

I like to imagine — usually when I’m in the shower, accepting my Nobel Prize for literature — that I was the inspiration behind Oxford’s word of the year.

After all, I’m just a few days away from (successfully!) wrapping up my first-ever 365 project, which involved taking a self-portrait a day, every day this year. And because I’m more likely to win a Nobel Prize for narcissism, I ended up using these self-portraits to switch up my Facebook profile pic every day, too.

In the last week, a few different people have asked if I’m going to continue the project (answer: TBD) and some have asked for advice on doing a similar challenge of their own.

I don’t really have a lot of advice to give. I mean, you take a picture of yourself every day for a year: BOOM, you’re done. But in case any of this might actually be useful, here are a few tips:

1. You’re more than just a pretty face
When taking the photos, I tried to include my face as much as possible. If any governmental authority was snooping, all I can say is HA HA HA HA HA (also: sorry I melted your server). That said, there were some days when other body parts — or even shadows — served instead:

2. The mirror is your friend
Nah, I don’t mean making sure that you don’t have kale stuck between your teeth, although there’s an easy fix for that: quit eating like a hipster pony. When you have to take this many photos, you’re going to need to mix it up occasionally and reflective surfaces (not just mirrors) can be a big help:

3. Best supporting actors
Got cute kids? Conscript them. Got cute pets? Well, they’re probably not as cute as you think they are, but sure, add them in, too. Spouses, friends, friendly mail carriers … all good. Just be sure that you properly calibrate the required level of cute before committing to a photo (ie: if you’re looking wretch, you’ll want attractive distractions; if you’re looking great, try fugly friends for contrast). Some ideas to get you started:

4. Hats help
I’m not really a hat person. I am however, a person who sufferers from random bouts of hat hair (even when I don’t wear a hat, in which case I do wear a hat).

5. Be your damn self
I’m pretty funny in real life. I’ve never won an award for it or anything, so it’s entirely possibly I’m funnier online (I did win an award for that). Not surprisingly, except for a few really genuinely pretty photos, the funny ones were the ones that people liked best. Here are a few of my favourites:

You may have noticed some crossover between categories: shadows that are also reflections, hats that are also funny. Congratulations, you have unlocked Level 10 of Observant Pedantry. This project is perfect for you … trust me.

Nine Decembers

December 24, 2013March 14, 2015 ~ Jeni ~ Leave a comment

December 1979
We were living in Webequie, Ontario. Joe Clark was Prime Minister. Despite regular calls home to her family, who kept her apprised of all the local gossip, no one ever told my mom there’d been an election. Which is why, to this day, she’ll slap you if you try to turn the channel during the news.

Speaking of freaky-deaky Dutch

December 12, 2013March 14, 2015 ~ Jeni ~ Leave a comment

Got this challenge from my friend Geoff and even though it’s supposed to be “played” on Facebook, I knew I was going to have too much to say. So here’s the extended response to this pretty straightforward challenge:

On glitter in Canadian politics

November 7, 2013March 14, 2015 ~ Jeni ~ Leave a comment

A week or so ago, I found out about an event — a fundraiser — for my political party of choice. I saw the invitation and decided quickly that it wasn’t for me. Last night, the rest of Twitter saw the promotional piece and promptly asploded. Here’s the item in question:

The world season calendar strikes again

September 26, 2013March 14, 2015 ~ Jeni ~ Leave a comment

Hey! Check out @The_Rumpus' "My Summer's End" Readers Report, wherein I curse about the Pope (not the one you think) http://t.co/LnBqk2vxS7

— Jeni Armstrong (@joyandwoe) September 26, 2013

That time I accidentally parked in a porn set

September 13, 2013March 14, 2015 ~ Jeni ~ Leave a comment

I had the car this afternoon so decided to run some errands, hoping that Juno would do another turn as Carnap the Magnificent. After a bit of driving around, we ended up at Toronto’s Cherry Beach.

It’s not the prettiest beach in the city. It’s somewhat secluded, even a tidge creepy. And today, home to some home-grown bow-chicka-wow-wow action.

On principal

September 3, 2013March 14, 2015 ~ Jeni ~ Leave a comment

I started writing this as a submission for a series on the end of summer, but it ran long and I didn’t have the heart to cut it by half. Happy back-to-school week, however you choose to celebrate it.

If you’re freaking out and you know it …

July 30, 2013March 14, 2015 ~ Jeni ~ Leave a comment

This time last week I arrived home from an afternoon at the wading pool to discover … ah … well, here’s how I described in a text message to P:

Happy Father’s Day! (Sorry you’re such an idiot.)

May 27, 2013March 14, 2015 ~ Jeni ~ Leave a comment

So there’s Target in Canada now, which means I finally understand what my American friends have been going on about for years:

“I swear, I only went there to buy Band-Aids and sunscreen … why did I just drop $134 on a new mirror, a Lego set, a pair of flip-flops, frozen cheesecake, a 16GB memory card, four sets of pyjamas and a mini wrench set?”

We finally went to the one nearest my house on an urgent late-afternoon caffeine quest (because the one near my parents’ place has a Starbucks in it, as does our local one, though I didn’t find it on that first visit). I got distracted, and instead of two tall dirty chais I walked out with a tiny pink watering can and a beach pail. For less than the cost of one of those drinks, so suck on that, Corporate (North) America.

I’m giving up emoticons for Lent

February 13, 2013March 14, 2015 ~ Jeni ~ Leave a comment

“I’m giving up emoticons for Lent. So if you have any difficulties picking up on sarcasm, you might want to give me up for Lent.”

Source: Me, yesterday, on Twitter.

I did it last year — without an announcement — and it was hard enough, and I’m sufficiently annoyed with myself for my chronic reliance on those little yellow moodmen, that I think it merits a repeat. So from now through the end of March, no emoticons for me.